HAR HAR HAR, BEST TITLE EVER RIGHT?!!!?!??!
As is evidenced by my intense cooing over Helen Bullock and Mary Katrantzou (oh gosh, i wonder where that link could possibly go), i am enchanted by flower blossoms – none of those outrageously humongous lily bouquets filled with way too many colors and arranged far too neatly, but wildflowers thrown haphazardly together, tumbling over each other without artifice and eschewing garish spectacle. It is a huge dream of mine to carpet a room with a layer of flower petals one foot deep, and just… fall backwards. I’d roll around in bliss, inhale deeply, and make a petal angel, of course.
Until i can procure enough flowers for that project, this will have to do! I went to a grocery store last weekend and found the least offensive (and expensive) bouquet that i could (can you believe that someone has bred violet flowers with caterpillar-green centers? I… i just don’t understand) – a small spray of purple chrysanthemums. It was only $5!
I stole my roommate’s scissors and cut the blossoms off of their stems.
I started by playing around with the sink! Originally, i was planning to leave the blossoms in the sink for other people to find and be delighted by, but then i realized that if i did that, i would be incapacitating one of our two non-clogged sinks (it’s actually kind of fascinating to see just how much water you use up brushing your teeth. But not when a dead beetle refuses to go down the drain). I had a feeling that any blossom-induced happiness would be quickly wiped out by washing your face two inches away from an insect corpse, gently bobbing in the water.
My next idea was to leave them on the windowsill for people, since no one relies on the windowsill for their hygienic needs.
Buuuuuuuuuuuut then i decided that i didn’t feel like being an altruistic little fairy. Instead, i took a shower in a bed of flowers!
Honestly, it wasn’t as great as i thought it would be; i forgot that i’d be wearing flip flops and i wasn’t able to feel the blossoms with my feet. The next time i’m home with a clean shower floor and a dirty body, though, i know what i’ll be doing!
ETA: I don’t like how this theme prevents me from making my pictures huge and assaulting, and i really don’t like how WordPress won’t let me alter the CSS without paying for the right to have a theme that satisfies my ridiculous, completely irrational desire to be able to post large pictures. If i can’t find an adequate theme, i’ll probably end up moving to Blogspot….